Flying into Chaos

Dear Fellow Travelers, Airline Personnel and Rude Individuals –

A recent airplane trip reminded, again, of how crazy this world can be. It seems that many travelers have lost all sense of common decency, common sense and manners. Most of the time its comical – but it’s also pretty sad. Please consider the following as a desperate plea for some consideration and a return to sanity. 

1. When you are standing in a security line as long as the Mississippi River please take off your coat and get other items as ready as you can while waiting. Some things can’t be helped and we humans only have two hands – but it’s just an “eensy” bit frustrating for the people behind the gentleman who has no carry on that somehow still manages to take more than a minute removing his coat and shoes.
2. And, yes, we do all have to take off our shoes. It is what it is. If you want to argue about it, please don’t do so with the screeners at the security checkpoint. It not only holds up the line – but probably is not the smartest move in the world if you want to actually get ON the plane.
3. You are not the only one boarding the plane, so please do not stand in the aisle removing your chap stick from your purse before you sit down, grabbing the newspaper out of your briefcase or stretching your legs. If your carry-on is stowed – sit down.
4. Pushing your carry-on impatiently into my backside while I am trying not to lose my temper with the chap sticks snails in front of me in an attempt to express your displeasure is just plain rude. Don’t. Just don’t.
5. On a similar topic – I know it sucks to try to cram your feet around a bunch of carry-on you had to stow under the seat in front of you, but if the first group of people boarding the plane insists on putting sweaters, coats, and purses in the overhead bins (on top of the bigger carry-on baggage everyone now carries to avoid paying baggage charges to the airlines), the people entering afterwards will have no choice.
6. It does not exactly inspire many smiles when the stewardess says “It’s not my job to help you stow carry-on. If I get hurt putting something in an overhead bin, you won’t have me here for the flight. What will you do then?” …. Especially repulsive when the words are directed at a lady who looks to be about 75 and is obviously struggling to reach that high. (And, yes, a stewardess on my flight to Atlanta did say exactly that.)
7. Please refrain from delivering the following over the loudspeaker in a tone dripping with condescension: “If you would like to get to Atlanta today people, you may want to take your seats before the afternoon passes us by.” While the sentiment is probably shared by plenty of the already-seated passengers on the plane, hardly any of those on board are likely to respond well.

Thanking the world’s travelers in advance for consideration of the above.

… If you’ve got travel tips of your own – please add to my list!