Category: Hysteria

The Great Movie Mystery

I love movies. Good movies, bad movies, funny movies, stupid movies. I have a (annoying?) tendency to see movies I love over and over. And I have a bizarre quirk of remembering actors and movies that most people have forgotten (usually for good reason).

I am particularly partial to horror movies (surprise, surprise) and pride myself on having seen some of the worst ever made. I bet you can see what’s coming ….

A couple days ago I had a conversation with friends about a movie they once saw, but cannot remember the name of … and I have not been able to identify it.

I will be immensely grateful if anyone out there can name this movie for me!

To sweeten the offer, the first person to figure it out will get some Halloween candy via post! (Only U.S.-based please, for custom reasons, but everyone is welcome to lend a hand if they want!) If you know the movie please leave a comment and tell me what it is!

Continue reading The Great Movie Mystery

Truth About Fortune

When I was a child my mother used to say:  “if you can’t say anything nice, better to say nothing at all” (or some variation of that). It seems, dear readers, that mamma knew exactly what she was talking about…. And I’d like to finish this opening with a shout out of thanks to the universe for knowing precisely when to shut its yap.

Let’s examine the evidence….

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Two plus two equals …?

Now I’m no genius when it comes to math — in fact, during my junior year in high school, I actually needed extra help with the coursework (which is why my university major had NOTHING to do with math or science)  – but I’m no dummy either. Still I can’t quite seem to wrap my head around the math behind recent experiences with Budget Rent a Car (a.k.a. @BudgetRAC)

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Bloody Shame

 

In a way it’s sort of galling to get a lesson in personal and civic responsibility from a nearly 3,000-year old vampire.

But when Russell Edgington — the heartbroken, blood-crazed vampire king of Mississippi — took to the airwaves on last night’s episode of True Blood to berate humans for thinking they are equal with vampires and deconstruct arguments that humans and vampires are alike, that’s exactly what happened.

And I quote:

I suppose, in a few small ways, we are. We’re narcissists. We care only about getting what we want no matter the cost … just like you.

Global warming, perpetual war, toxic waste, child labor, torture, genocide … that’s a small price to pay for your SUVs, and your flat screen TVs. Your designer jeans; Your absurd, garish McMansions! … futile symbols of permanence to quell your quivering spineless souls …

 

Ok, so let’s forget for a second this admonition was delivered by a being

that eats humans for dinner.

Let’s ignore the fact his diatribe was delivered while

holding a bloody portion of a human’s spine.

Let’s also skip over the really ewwww-y fact that the King spent much of last night’s episode crying over a ridiculously ornate punch bowl filled with the splattered remains of his dead mate.

 

The man (er … vampire) has a point …

Continue reading Bloody Shame

Booklist for Eternity

 

What books would you take with you if the world was about to end?

Strange question, right? But think about it for a second. For most writers and academics, the end-of-the-world-is-coming packing list would surely involve some pained (though probably quick, given the bigger picture,) thought over which works to take from the family or work library.

The question has been bugging me since I caught an airing of 2012 – which, beside an awesomely odd performance by Woody Harrelson, some great special effects and an extremely engaging Russian pilot named Sasha, is little more than so-so — on the television.

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Voices of the Year represent an amazing community

The unthinkable has happened!

I am a 2010 BlogHer Voice of the Year finalist!!!

I can’t even type that without letting out an ear-splitting “squeeeeee!” and sending our cats – yet again – scurrying for the safety of the nearest closet. Actually, our cats have taken up semi-permanent residence (alternately) on the ceiling, in the closet and under the bed from the incessant screaming since I found out that somehow I made the finalist list.

If this keeps up, I predict a visit to the vet’s office to get some anxiety pills for our beloved felines.

(And I’ll be asking the vet to send the bill to BlogHer.)

Continue reading Voices of the Year represent an amazing community

“Human” response to the zombie apocalypse

If a shambling horde has set up camp outside your front and back doors, it is probably a bit late to think about preparations for a zombie infestation.

Grab yourself a backpack (toss in some canned food, first aid supplies, whatever prescriptions you’re taking), as much potable water as you have canisters for and a pillow, and climb up into your attic or crawlspace … and hope for the best.

If the living dead have not yet overrun your city, you have some time to really think about what you will do to survive the apocalypse.

Only those who seriously consider the future and act to plan for it now have any chance at survival. And like I said before, as with any issue facing the human race – poverty, hunger, human rights, the environment — we are stronger if we stick together.

Here are a few things to consider as you craft a plan to stay alive:

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Worldwide zombie infestations begin …

The zombie hordes have invaded our cities. No one is safe. The shambling rotting corpses are everywhere!!!! A zombie apocalypse has begun.

As the infestations spread across borders a growing number of vigilant citizens around the world are taking up arms to battle back the hordes. Our only hope as a species – as it has always been – lies in putting aside our individual differences in favor of cooperating for the whole.

Since the beginning of June, the world has been in the grip of an all-out “braiiiiiins fest” that erupted after years of growing Hollywood, gamer and novel obsession with the living dead.

Those of you who dismissed my early warnings may have been laughing then …. well you’re likely to find yourselves dinner shortly.

But don’t take my word for it. Examine the evidence yourself.

Continue reading Worldwide zombie infestations begin …

Why I no longer worry about typos …

Ok, ok, I admit it. I love the weird and wacky (as if you all didn’t know that already). *snort*

I also love to laugh. With a life as busy and often convoluted as mine, I rely heavily on my over-active sense of humor to get me through.

And I’ve discovered a great place to find a giggle is the spam folder of my blog’s comment section! I mean, seriously. Do people really expect I’ll approve this stuff?!?!

Well, at the risk of attracting even more odd spam, I am sharing a few of the funnies to carry us all through hump day towards the weekend.

Continue reading Why I no longer worry about typos …

Off the Edge of the Map: Cat Poop Coffee

What coffee drinker out there hasn’t stopped at the local convenience store to grab a quick cuppa joe, only to take a sip, spit it out and exclaim “this tastes like crap!” while tossing the offending item into the nearest trash receptacle?

Piece of advice … next time, hold on to your $0.99 cup of crap because it’s a heck of a lot cheaper than the world’s most expensive cat-poop-coated coffee beans.

Yep. I said cat poop. And yep, God help me, I am serious.

Continue reading Off the Edge of the Map: Cat Poop Coffee