Zombie War of the Sexes

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One of my favorite scenes in AMC’s new hit The Walking Dead involves a group of women sitting by the water, washing laundry and conversing in the easy banter of eternal sisterhood. The scene is timeless. It could be a group of women from any culture, speaking any language. It just rings true.

Their banter is heartwarming …. and, ummmmm, well?

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“I miss my vibrator.”

 

CLASSIC.

… And judging from the types of men likely to be available (more on this in a later post), I’m gonna say your friendly neighborhood vibrator is a packing necessity

*runs to make a quick addition to pre-packed disaster bag*

 

In the subsequent episode two of the survivor group’s women provide a tasty meal – after having gone fishing for the day.

That started me thinking … I know, I know, “uh-oh”

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What is it about women that would make us more likely to survive in a zombie apocalypse?

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NUTURE – We do it. We can’t help it. When the going gets tough – we hug. Now this might not seem like a vital survival skill at first glance, but there is more to survival than just physical wellbeing. Trust me, when the bodies start piling up you’ll be racing for the nearest pair of open arms that don’t smell of rotting flesh.

SACRIFICE – We live it – gladly. I don’t know a single female who has not willingly made sacrifices for the children, relatives and friends she loves. This willingness to put other before ourselves is noble and a vital component to retaining survivor humanity in the weeks, months and years after a cataclysmic event.

(And, no, this does not preclude the famous you-are-on-my-trip-list-to-escape strategy. #justsayin)

FIERCE – Ever seen a lioness protect her cubs? ‘nuff said.

HOUSEKEEPING – Back at The Walking Dead water scene, one of the ladies makes a quip about the division of labor. But the truth is most females are programmed to “nest” – ie. to turn even the crappiest living spaces into a “home.” Unfortunately that also means – and I can’t quite believe I am going to say this publicly – that, yes, we’re likely to be picking up after the men of the group because we just. can’t. stand. the. clutter.

PAIN – We give birth to children. We get the monthly deluge. We can withstand anything.

PROVIDERS – Not only can many of us fish or build a basic animal trap, but we can make a meal out of anything….just ask the average mother of three crafting a dinner plan the night before pay-day.

TENACITY – Yeah, we have a tendency to scream. So what? When the world goes to sh*t over the span of a few hours, women have proven time and time again, that panic, despair and tears are a temporary response. It is the women who emerge calm, focused and ready to rebuild the world, one family at a time. Doubt me? Ask the survivors of Hurricane Katrina, the Asian tsunami or the recent Pakistani floods.

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So, ladies, what would you add?

 

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And gentlemen – feel free to propose counter arguments …

 

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my crossbow is loaded!

 

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And as a squeee worthy follow up?

 

The Walking Dead cast member Anthony Guajardo had this to add:

@jterzieff haha “my crossbow is loaded” it was great article and i loved the laundry scene because Ed got what he deserved! 12 minutes ago via web in reply to jterzieff

Originally from: http://twitter.com/AnthonyGuajardo/status/8614775516823552

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19 Comments to “Zombie War of the Sexes”

  1. R.C. Murphy says:

    When I saw the scene with the women doing laundry, at first I cringed. It was so typical for the men to be effing around while the “little ladies” took care of household needs.

    Then the vibrator talk happened.

    I gotta admit, I fell off the couch laughing. What I loved is that it wasn’t just the single women in on the talk. The end of days as we know if have come, but the women haven’t. I am a firm believer that sexual satisfaction sharpens the brain’s responses. It also relieves stress, and provides a little heart rate boost not driven from fear.

    And lets be honest, getting laid during the zombie apocalypse might be a tad difficult. Men are on the front lines, therefore the most likely to be killed. While that does leave the women to tend camp like she would a home, it also leaves the penis to lady-bits ratio a tad skewed.

    Have you seen a sexually active woman that’s gone a while without a good release? It is almost as scary as PMS.

    *looks up at her comment* Man, you can tell I haven’t gotten laid in a while. I focused on the sex stuff. Bahaha!

  2. I haven’t seen the said scene but I have a hard time seeing anyone surviving zombie apocalypse. Except the vibrators. 🙂

  3. juliette says:

    Oh lawdy — you DID NOT!
    *glances up*
    She did.
    Should I?????

    – J

  4. V Demetros says:

    That scene was classic, no kidding.
    Don’t forget that women may think a little longer about something before acting on it. Men just haul off and shoot someone’s head off before checking to make sure he really is a zombie. Sure, we may get killed by taking a moment to check, but for the most part women will save the planet by not flying off the handle and making rash decisions.

    Also, I think women are more tolerant. We would accept everyone into our non-zombie camp. Notice what a dick that guy on the roof was? I don’t see too many women acting like that, although I know they’re out there.

  5. juliette says:

    *picks self up from the floor*
    Best. comment. EVER.

  6. juliette says:

    Can’t say I disagree!
    I actually had tolerant on my mental list as well — very glad you added it!!!

  7. Regan Leigh says:

    We — as women — have the ability to love in the deepest and scariest of ways. That is what can lead to our downfall. 😉

  8. juliette says:

    Good point — a note of caution!!!

    Thank you for the comment!!!

    xoxo

  9. Laina says:

    Let’s just say there is a reason my 6’5″ cousin is afraid of 5′ 2.5″ me 😉

  10. juliette says:

    Right on Laina!!!

    *giggles*

  11. BigWords says:

    Batteries have a shelf life – if the zombie apocalypse descends upon us, you had better hope they back back to manufacturing them before the existing supplies are all used up. And it isn’t as if we would need them for anything important, such as flashlights, radio equipment, or even alarm clocks…

  12. juliette says:

    Well put, sir, VERY well put

    *lowers crossbow*

  13. R.C. Murphy says:

    BUT! There are some that run on rechargeable batteries… making their shelf life longer than a normal vibrator/battery combo.

    How did we go from zombies munching on the men to vibrators? Oh wait, I think I led the charge on that one…

  14. women will lay down their life to save another faster,quicker,and truer than any men (sorry guys) but its true

  15. juliette says:

    Amen Jennifer!

    no use in denying it!! LOL

  16. BigWords says:

    If this topic continues I may very well pull a Leroy Jenkins when the undead rise.

  17. JL Coburn says:

    There are some solar powered vibrators out there now so hey, no need to worry about batteries. I can’t remember where I saw it, probably Gizmod, but they run something like $40-$60. Maybe I should get one for the bug-out kit for the wife.

  18. juliette says:

    LOL!!

    oh lawdy lawdy yer all cut from the same cloth and i am surrounded by weirdos

    oh, .. hello soul mates!!

    – J

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